1. What curse word do you use the most? Fuck I guess, I curse ALOT

2. Do you own an iPod? No I don't

3. What person on your flist do you talk to the most? Iunno

4. What time is your alarm clock set to? 8am

5. Do you still remember the first person you kissed? It's between two boys that I played Truth or Dare with in grade 7 or 8.

6. Do you remember where you were on Sept 11, 2001? I was in Dartmouth NS like WTF?

7. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Take the picture

8. What was the last movie you watched? Out at the Wedding

9. Do any of your friends have children? Ringwench has one in the oven

10. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Sure

11. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep? Nope

12. What CD is currently in your CD player? CD? U must mean mp3..

13. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? I prefer chocolate milk but for whatever reason it doesn't prefer me lol

14. Has anyone told you a secret this week? Yes I know all the secrets

15. When was the last time you had Starbucks? I don't do Starbucks

16. Can you whistle? Yep!

17. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Their sense of humour, cuz they are only good for a laugh or two.

18. What are you looking forward to? Moving!!!

19. Did you watch cartoons as a child? Yes and I still do.

20. Do you own any band t-shirts? Nope

21. What will you be doing in one hour? Exercising hopefully

22. Is anyone in love with you? I wish lol

23. What was the last song you heard? Lady Gaga Just Dance (it's playing in my head does that count?)

24. Last time you cried? Hmm last week sometime?

25. Are you on a desktop computer or a laptop? desktop, I'm selling my laptop tho if anyone is interested.

26. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos? Maybe a nose ring or an eyebrow ring. No mouth piercings tho cuz I can't help but play with them and then I get a sore jaw.

27. What’s the weather like? Been raining too much around here lalely, it sucks.

28. Would you ever date a girl/guy covered in tattoos? I might, depends on their personality.

29. What did you do before this? I'm not tellin!

30. When is the last time you slept on the floor? I don't recall

31. How many hours of sleep do you need to function? The more the better.

32. Do you eat breakfast daily? No

33. Are your days fast-paced? No

34. What did you do last night? Got stoned and streamed a movie

35. Do you use sarcasm? no sarcasm uses me

36. How old will you be turning on your next birthday? 28

37. Are you picky about spelling and grammar? Yes, unproper grammar irks me ;) me fail english that's unpossible!

38. Have you ever been to six flags? I've been to the first 5.. lol

39. Do you get along better with the same sex or the opposite sex? I think people tend to get along better with whoever they aren't sleeping with so in my case men and straight women.

40. Do you like mustard? sometimes

41. Do you sleep on your side? No

42. Do you watch the news? Nope

43. How did you get one of your scars? Got dizzy cracked my forehead on the corner of a child sized organ. Ah the 80's

44. Who was the last person to make you mad? Dan

45. Do you like anybody? Sure, likable ppl

46. What is the last thing you purchased? pizza

47. What side of the heart do you draw first? the right

48. Can you dive without plugging your nose? Yes

49. What color is your razor? purple

50. What is your blood-type? o+

51. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours? Eliza Dushku

52. What is a rumor someone has spread about you? What isn't?

53. How do you feel about carrots? orange things are usually good for a person

54. How many chairs at the dining room table? 6

55. Which is the best Spice Girl? Um the dykey one? I dunno.

56. Do you know what time it is? It's howdy doody time? Wow that was wayyy past my time.

57. Do you know all the words to the Fresh Prince Theme Song? Sadly yes

58. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator? Depends on who I was stuck in the elevator with.

59. What’s your favorite kind of gum? bubblicious

60. T or F: All’s fair in love and war? False

61. Do you have a crush on anyone? Sorta, not really

62. Do you know how to use some words correctly, but not know the meaning? I know the meaning but I wouldn't be able to explain it intelligently.

63. Do you like to sleep? Yes.

64. Do you know which US states don’t use Daylight Savings Time? No I'm from Canada.

65. Do you know the song Total Eclipse of the Heart? Oh god, yeah. *shudder*

66. Do you want a bright yellow ‘06 mustang? How about a red 1965 mustang! Either is good.

67. What’s something you’ve always wanted? A huge awesome hammock

68. Do you have hairy LEGS? Not at the moment

69. Would you rather swim in the ocean or a lake? Ocean

70. Do you wear a lot of black? No I wear an appropriate amount of black.

71. Describe your hair. In transition. GROW DAMN YOU!

72. Do you have Entomophobia? I don't have any phobia's

73. Are you an adult? So my health card tells me

74. Where is/are your best friend(s)? Ottawa

75. Do you have a tan? My arms are tanned, my legs r soo white lol

76. Are you a television addict? I stream all because I am intolerant of schedules and commercials.

77. Do you enjoy spending time with your mother? sometimes

78. Are you a sugar freak? I don't think so.

79. Do you like orange juice? Nope Sunny Delight is good sometimes though.

80. What sign are you? Scorpio

I went to Ottawa this weekend. I stayed at Ray's place in Kanata. I got to meet my perspective roommate and see the apartment. Ray and I went and saw ICe Age 3 in 3D, it wasn't worth the money we spent to go. Got to see Travis before I bussed back. Overall a productive weekend.

The Devil

The main idea here is bondage. You may quite sensibly take on a large responsibility such as a mortgage or an obligation, or you may mortgage your free time by starting a course of education. These matters are positive but they still tie you down. More positively this card can indicate a good sexual relationship to come.

Knight of Swords (Negative)

A sarcastic, chaotic, or even violent man may enter your life now. Guard against being sucked into criminal or self-destructive behaviour.

The Lovers

Key Ideas: Love. Beauty. Harmony. Important choices.
There are a few ideas to be taken into consideration when the Lovers card appears and the first of these is that love may indeed be on the way. If you are lonely, there will soon be someone around for you to love, and if you simply need a bit of company and companionship, this too is around the corner. The atmosphere amongst your workmates, friends, and family will be peaceful and harmonious in the future and your surroundings will become nicer and more attractive. A relationship that is in its infancy will become stronger and if you have any doubts about the sincerity of your lover, then this card is a reassuring one to find.

The second main idea is that of choices to be made and you are reminded that your decisions will have a ripple effect on those around you. Therefore, if you chose to embark on a new romance, start a course of training or take a job in a new location, the needs of your loved ones must be taken into account.

Nine of Wands (Negative)

A loss of status and position are possible. Illness may be on the way.

Eight of Wands

This is a card of expansion and it often signifies travel. New faces and new experiences are on the way and there will be friendship and maybe even love in the near future.

Three of Swords (negative)

And end of heartache is in sight and you will come to terms with loss or rejection. A minor surgical procedure is possible, as is going to a funeral.

Six of Wands

This card is often referred to as the card of victory as it depicts a victor coming home after a battle. Your particular battle may relate to business and finances, a legal matter, studying and examinations.

Don't forget to watch the blooper reels!

Title: Dollhouse: Above & Below
Music: The Bravery
Vidder: Tweyelite
Specs: 1.24 min. long, used Ulead Video Studio 11

Copy of vid at:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/a7pdfu

Because Youtube copyright Nazi's are assholes the link to the video is below..

http://www.imeem.com/people/J-O0U4r/video/rEerusp6/tweyelite-dollhouse-above-below-tv-video/

The sound might be a little lagged while listening due to streaming issues. *sigh*

YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I want to know 28 things about you. I don't care if we've never talked, never really clicked, or if we already know everything about each other. I really don't. You are obviously on my flist, so let me know with whom I'm friends!

Please join in- silly answers are more than welcome!



1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of LJ?:
10. What's your philosophy on life?:
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?:
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?:
13. What is your favorite memory of us?:
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?:
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?:
17. Can we get together and make a cake?:
18. Which country is your spiritual home?:
19. What is your big weakness?:
20. Do you think I'm a good person?:
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?:
22. Describe your accent:
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?:
24. What do you wear to sleep?:
25. Trousers or skirts?:
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?:
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!):
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?:

Monthly Horoscope Scorpio:

An astrological aspect of transiting Pluto to Moon will generate a series of very intense psychological, sentimental and affectionate experiences throughout the month of June. You now are going to discover feelings that are deeply rooted and in some way bound to your instinctive nature. It is advisable not to repress those feelings, Scorpio!

Sun Square Pluto from June 16, 2009 to June 18, 2009: You will also notice an increase in your sexual energy during the time of this astrological aspect, but at given times it could be expressed abruptly and vacillating. A satisfying sexual relationship requires self-control, commitment and desire.

Also, it may boost your ego when others remark about you, but it also has it's disadvantages since, whether you like it or not, there always will be a certain amount of criticism.


www.lestrology.com

Oh Scorpio -- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause you look like an angel. Think that's bad? Wait, I've got an even better one: Can you give me a quarter? I need to call the cops and tell them you've stolen my heart.

As if you could help it, you sexy thing. People sometimes ask me if Scorpios are really... you know. The answer, of course, is yes. This is not to say you're some kind of cheap floozy. Far from it, your standards are almost impossibly high. Butter doesn't melt in your mouth, but women can't help but dissolve. Once you track down worthy prey, you'll hypnotize her with your dangerous gaze and strike with your tongue. I wouldn't be surprised if your eyes were a snapping brown or black, but even if you have baby blues there's a pair of coals smoldering away somewhere back there. Jodie Foster was born in November, and she might have one of the most intense gazes on the silver screen. You keep the heat turned down just below the point of explosion, because you disdain a drama queen. The sloppy antics of a blustering Leo or whining Libra are just gauche in your opinion.

As women, and especially as lesbians, Scorpios tend to embrace the masculine side of their natures. This is not to assume you're hard butch, Scorpio. If you decide to play it femme, nobody matches you for untouchable grace and elegance. You can do the woman performance with all the pride of a faux queen. But no matter how you identify, there's something steely and controlled just beneath your exterior. Unlike a Pisces or an Aquarius you don't go out of your way to look for the best in people, and you certainly aren't holding your breath for the day when James Dobson will hold hands with Rosie O'Donnell and sing kumbayah. People who sell out bear the brunt of your indifference, right up there with ex's who let themselves go and friends who let you down.

Many astrologers would call your uncompromising behavior cold and calculating, but really you're just holding back the fire until you find someone who can take the heat. This applies to lovers, of course; but you also choose your friends and causes carefully. You hold yourself in high regard, so it's not like you're going to throw yourself away toiling for something or someone you don't care about. Anyone who tries to recruit you using flattery is just kidding themselves. "Would you play the Rubyfruit benefit? You're the best deejay ever." If you don't give a flip about whether a bar stays open, you'll probably just respond, "I know," and go move with your life.

It's performances like these that make you enemies, but few are foolish enough to defy you openly. If looks can kill, then yours is the head of the Medusa. Not that you walk around with a frown, a scowl or even a grin. Quite the contrary, you have a smooth poker face. Tell the truth: you work at it. You might be burning with rage, but you would never show it. Why get angry when you can get even? If you think a friend has gone out of her way to snub you, you'll snub her to even the score. You'll probably double your revenge to prove who's boss. Sounds like somebody needs some Oprah, my dear.

Don't be too pleased with yourself, even though it looks like you've got it all going on: a great poker face, power, and plenty of... you know. What's a G.I. Jane to do with it all? There's the rub. I think it's time to delve into the unique dual nature of Scorpio, which is one of the greater complexities of the zodiac. The scorpion that stoops low is a nocturnal predator, one who sneaks up on unsuspecting pray and strikes for the sheer pleasure of inflicting pain. But a Scorpio can always rise from the ashes of destruction to be reborn as an eagle -- still a predator, but at least the noble, beautiful kind.

There is a third variety of Scorpio, a sort of cautionary tale: the gray scorpion. This type doesn't strike out or fly high -- rather, she becomes trapped in a perverse reality of her own making. It's all very Blanche Dubois, and I recommend you get to a shrink immediately if you start feeling paranoid. Speaking of which, make sure you get that yearly gyno checkup -- Scorpios tend to have trouble with their reproductive organs. You never know when Crosby, Stills, Nash or Young might offer to father your child (worked for Melissa Etherage and Julie Cypher). You might also have problems with nose bleeds, and not because just because you invite a punch in the face. Circulatory system, throat, arms, legs, it's all vulnerable. If you didn't have alot of stamina, I might be worried about you. You're a generally healthy person. And when death comes knocking, you have an uncanny ability to convince him you're not home.

So there it is, Scorpio. I don't know if you'll wind up being the president or a drunken mess. You might wander off into the Gobi Desert to meditate in solitude, or into the wilds of Manhattan. Whatever you decide to do, you'll put your soul into it. If you want to be a hedge fund manager, you'll throw your back out attempting to make the most billions. As a litigator, you'll have your jury under a spell. You simply don't have it in you to be flighty or noncommittal. This extends to both ambitions and relationships. Once you decide someone is on your team, you'll go to hell and back to save them, or at the very least promote their best interests. If you want my advice, keep plenty of Cancers and Pisces on your speed dial. They can get you in touch with the softer, gentler side of yourself. If nothing else, they'll appreciate your intensity.

I went to Stefan's BBQ at 4:30 pm. There was around 20, 25 ppl there. It was awesome. There were little pockets of conversation going on everywhere. I got to see my old roomie Erin. I fuckin' love that chick and I haven't seen her in a looong damn time. So it was really neat to see old acquaintances and meet new ones. I'm having a lovely weekend.

We enter the church pausing as we look and listen, no one else is around, only silence is heard. We smile wickedly at one another as I wink at you. I grab your hand and drag you, willingly, towards the confessional. As we enter it and shut the door I say in a whisper, “Forgive me lord for I am about to sin.” as you giggle and look at me with that fake coyness you’re so good at projecting.

You’re dark eyes draw me in and I immediately press your body hard up against the wooden wall of the confessional. I kiss you savagely and you wiggle in mock protest. I play along with you and use my hand to capture your wrists above your head.

You’re gasping quietly now as I run my free hand up the inside of your thigh. I’m so thankful you wore a skirt and even more thankful you chose not to wear underwear on this excursion.

I slide my hand against your warm thigh avoiding the one place you want me to touch most as I continue to stare into your lust filled gaze. My body is flush against yours as I slide my left leg between your thighs. You gasp softly, trying to be quiet as you bite your lip. It makes me want you even more and I didn’t think that was possible.

You’re hips begin to undulate against my leg as your breath grows more ragged. I let go of your hands in order to grasp your waist and move into your thrusts with gusto. You’re hands, now free, slip into my hair as you grasp tightly, pulling it with enough force for me to feel my scalp tingle deliciously. And then you kiss me.

I’m surrounded by the scent of us, a mixture of me and you and it intoxicates me like no drug ever could. I slide one of my hands from your waist into your hot slick wetness. I stroke you as if in greeting, softly, up and down, just a teasing touch at first.

You’re eyes tell me what you want, what you need. But so does your voice as you whisper to me forcefully, “I need your fingers inside of me now!” Now it is I who’s breath is ragged as I feel the air leave my lungs.

I slip two fingers deep inside of you as you moan loudly, unable to stop yourself. You lean your head against my shoulder biting it to try and smother the sounds you’re making, the sounds I’m causing you to make. I’ve never felt as powerful as I do now surrounded by you, you’re breath, your taste, your touch, your voice, your smell. It’s so exquisite it’s almost too much and yet it feels like it will never be enough.

Now I am completely focused, as I let your bodies rhythm teach me how you want it. Hard and fast apparently, as you buck wildly against my hand. I lick my lips for the millionth time, for all the liquid in my body is now pooled elsewhere. I did wear underwear and after this I am definitely going to need to change them, and my pants. I still feel the wet spot on my thigh where you pressed against me. The world fades away. The place we’re in, everything. There is only you and I and how we feel. And oh how we feel.. Your legs begin to quiver and your gasps sound desperate, desperate for me, desperate for release.

I push against you harder and curl my fingers inside of you hitting you’re G-spot. It’s too much for you to take and you climax, shaking, with a grunt as I feel your warm sticky wetness all over my hand. I hold you up as you recover, not trusting your weakened knees to keep you standing. As your breath leaves you it enters me and we share the humid air. I wrap you in a tight embrace. I feel lightheaded as you whisper, “Jesus.” right next to my ear. I smile to myself, proud and grateful that I was the one you chose to be here with you.

After a few minutes of holding you I reach down to your now overly sensitive clit and use the same two fingers that were inside of you only moments before, coating them your essence. You watch me as I lick them clean, tasting your sweet saltiness.

When you see this you lean forward and kiss me softly, tasting yourself on my tongue and I sigh contentedly. I nuzzle my nose against yours, both of us smiling peacefully. We take a moment to straighten out our clothes and hair. I then peak out the door of the confessional. Still not a sound to be heard or a person to be seen.

As we head towards the exit I pause momentarily and dip my fingers, still sticky from your juices, into the holy water as I perform the sign of the cross. I silently thank god for the use of his house and for meeting a kindred spirit such as you.

The End

I wish my well of tears would finally run dry
If only I could ascend up into the blue sky
And forget all of my unfulfilled dreams
Knowing that life is never what it seems

Love, the brass ring we all reach for
Everyone's looking for something more
Like emotional vampires we need to feed
Never caring about the cost of our greed

Selflessness and responsibility are out of style
Just grab what you can and enjoy it for a while
We give and we give and take what we can get
We mortgage our hearts and are left with the debt

Bitterness and shame worm their way in
An emotional battleground where nobody wins
I wish I could get off this crazy ride
And float on my back, away with the tide

Sometimes in the middle of the night when I can't sleep and my thoughts run a muck in my mind I am so lonely, so thirsty, for something more. The silence soothes me as an old friend and then stabs me softly in the back. I eventually drift off to sleep to dream the same dream I've always dreamed. When I wake up I don't remember it. I never remember. I want to remember.

He came uninvited
Into my home
Into my world
He stole things
Only things
Things that can be replaced

He was in my room
In my underwear drawer
He went where he doesn't belong
Invading my privacy
Without thought or care

He took things that I need
Irreplaceable things
He stole my peace of mind
He took my illusion of safety
He had no right
He left me feeling
Violated

The soul of one so caring
The beauty I hear in her smile
A heavy load she is bearing
She does so with grace and style

The words that she speaks
Taste sweet on my tongue
She's everyone's hero
As of yet unsung

She sees what others miss
With her knowing cerulean eyes
And with a soft gentle kiss
I float into her skies

Relationship Status

Interdependence
Interdependence refers to how much you need dependency or a “couple identity” with your partner. You are moderately interdependent in a relationship. This means that you desire a good degree of physical and emotional connection with a partner. And you absolutely are drawn to someone whom you can respect and even emulate to some degree. In fact, it is quite common for a person in this score range to consider how your romantic partner would reflect on your family and friends. This all does not mean that you do not need personal space now and then; nearly everyone values being unique and different from others in some respects. However, people in this range draw strength, comfort and a strong sense of identity from their close relationships. Thus, when you feel close to someone this person becomes an extremely important part of who you are on the inside and outside. You probably prefer that you and your partner’s recreational activities be shared together since you like having your partner physically close and you desire showing off your “couplehood” in public. Bottom line: you need someone who likes frequent physical and emotional connection like you do, but who helps keeps dependency in check in the relationship so that you two do not lose your identities as individuals.

Intimacy
Intimacy refers to the how much you need emotional closeness with your partner. You are very comfortable with being intimate and vulnerable with a partner. However, your desire for emotional closeness and security puts you at some risk for disclosing too much, too soon when a relationship is newly developing. People like you have big hearts and an impressive openness to your partner. That openness includes lessons learned from your past experiences and relationships, extending trust, believing your partner returns your feelings and devotion and being generally comfortable with surrendering yourself to a partner. In fact, you probably feel very uncomfortable – and even guilty – if there were any secrets between you and your partner. Likewise, you regard your lover as your best friend and your foremost confidant. There is typically no hesitation discussing current problems or concerns with this person. It also seems that you have realistic expectations for a committed relationship. You are willing to act on the belief that your partner’s feelings are equally as strong as yours. Therefore, you are probably not deterred in taking the risks associated with being vulnerable on all levels. Bottom line: you need someone who believes and acts on the belief that the intimacy of a relationship is sacred.

Issues you seem to Over-value

I worry that romantic partners will not care about me as much as I care about them. Possible reasons you responded this way include negative motivations and positive motivations. On the negative side, it could mean that you have a low self-esteem and self-image, that you fear you will not live up to your partner’s expectations, that you are insecure or that you rush into relationships. On the positive side, it could mean that you have a healthy concern for the quality of your relationship, that you can keep track of your own needs and desires in a relationship or that you have a tremendous capacity for loving and caring about a partner.

Self-efficacy
Self-Efficacy refers to your self-image, stability of mood and level of motivation. People at your scoring level feel assertive and expressive most of the time and strive to maintain a positive attitude. You likely find that having plans and structured goals help motivates and guides your personal and professional development. Many people in this scoring range are visionary in their ambitions, but they can be highly self critical. Indeed, you are likely to be acutely aware of your own strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, it probably helps for you to hear praise and recognition, as well as have measurable goals and benchmarks in order to feel competent in your decisions and actions and to achieve a strong sense of accomplishment. Bottom line: you need someone who is extremely supportive of your goals by showing patience and a positive outlook and who also frequently acknowledges and praises your small and large accomplishments.

Issues you seem to Over-value

I find it pointless to continue working on things that are too difficult for me. Possible reasons you responded this way include negative motivations and positive motivations. On the negative side, it could mean that you are easily frustrated, that you are overly self critical and impatient or that you have little motivation to learn new things or tackle new challenges. On the positive side, it could mean that you are realistic about your limitations, you value time and do not want to waste it or that you seek out alternative solutions to problems.

Relationship readiness
Relationship Readiness refers to how prepared you are emotionally, psychologically and pragmatically for a committed relationship. In some ways, you may not be fully ready for a committed relationship. You seem to feel a fair degree of comfort and grounding in your life right now. In fact, most people in this range have a clear vision and a sense of purpose for their life. They also feel in control, but sometimes that sense of control can be fleeting or a false sense of security. For example, it is often the case that people in this scoring range need to address unresolved issues that can interfere with them having the life and relationship they want. These could be financial or legal issues or even physical, emotional or health issues. It may also be the case that you are seeking a relationship primarily to fill a void in your life or to gain a feeling of acceptance and belonging that was weakened or lost due to other relationships that ended or disappointed you. Bottom line: you need someone who will be patient and supportive as you figure out your needs rather than who will rush the relationship prematurely.

Issues you seem to Under-value

I have a good sense of where I am headed in my life. Possible reasons you responded this way include negative motivations and positive motivations. On the negative side, it could mean that you are self critical, that you are in a state of personal/ professional flux or change or that you are addressing personal issues or baggage from past relationships. On the positive side, it could mean that you are open to new and varied experiences, that you are not overly rigid or that you are not a black-and-white thinker.

Communication
Communication refers to your approach to interpersonal interactions and level of emotional intelligence. Effective communicators have strong emotional intelligence, and you have the necessary foundation for strong emotional intelligence. People in this scoring range enjoy the learning opportunities of most challenges and are not afraid of making or admitting to mistakes. It is brave to show this level of vulnerability to others. Therefore, it is not surprising that you are sensitive to and accepting of other people’s expressions of vulnerability. For example, you can likely sense when someone feels troubled before being told. However, your sensitivity has limits. Most in this scoring range are neither comfortable nor patient with all expressions of emotion. They also are not keenly aware of all of the types of nonverbal signs that people send out nor are they always cognizant of how their own behavior impacts others. It is likely that you seek for others to understand you, rather than you seek to understand others. Bottom line: you need someone who seeks to understand you, thereby accepting an equal share of responsibility in maintaining open and honest communication in the relationship.

Conflict resolution
Conflict Resolution refers to your stress management and problem solving skills. Effective conflict resolution has nine general elements: View Conflict as Positive; Address Conflict in the Proper Atmosphere; Clarify Perceptions; Note Needs, not wants; Draw on the Power of a Positive Partnership; Focus on the Future, then learn from the past; Identify Options for Mutual Gain; Develop ‘Doables’ or stepping stones to action; and Make Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. Your score indicates that you are fairly strong on all of these basic elements, except for Making Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. This suggests that you are very flexible and action-oriented when addressing problems, yet not so eager to find resolution that you settle for quick, temporary agreements. Settling on a temporary agreement is often a way of avoiding conflict, and it can lead to needs not being met. You do not seem to avoid conflict; instead you appear to evaluate the possible solutions and then actively engage your partner to work on a positive outcome for the relationship. Bottom line: you need someone who will join you in taking time to find a complete and genuine resolution to issues as opposed to avoiding conflict by settling for quick, temporary agreements.


Issues you seem to Over-value

In conflict my reactions are based on how I think the other party perceives me. Possible reasons you responded this way include negative motivations and positive motivations. On the negative side, it could mean that you do not value individuality and independence or that you posture to people. On the positive side, it could mean that you are not self absorbed or egotistical, that you have good emotional intelligence or that you do not jump to conclusions.

Sexuality
Sexuality refers to your needs (frequency, boundaries, expressions) related to physical intimacy. Scientific models of love and attachment always include physical chemistry and sexuality. It is a crucial topic for any couple to address, because it involves issues of control and vulnerability. People at your scoring level have a firm sense of their sexual orientation, preferred sexual activities and comfort level. You like sex that is romantic, adventurous and fun, but for you sex is not a casual event. Sex has great importance in your relationship, and it is reserved for someone you love. You may think your sexual preferences would be viewed as conservative by others, but you are hardly a prude. You tend to be very confident in your sexual ability, you are not self conscious in bed and you are open to try various activities. People in this scoring range are willing to be vulnerable and relinquish control in the bedroom to their partners. In other words, you are not sexually selfish. While you appreciate spontaneity and wild abandon in sex, you also seem to like for sex to be planned to some extent. Most times this probably reflects the fact that you like to set the mood, build anticipation and ensure you have privacy and no interruptions. Bottom line: you need someone who regards sex as a meaningful bond between people in love and who appreciates when it is planned to some extent rather than completely spontaneous.


Attitudes toward love
Attitudes Toward Love refers to your level of needs for romantic love and friendship love. There are two main types of love – Romantic Love and Companionate Love. Romantic Love is passionate, emotional and intense, whereas Companionate Love is a deep, affectionate attachment. People feel these two types of loves to different degrees in a relationship, and the levels of each can fluctuate over time. You scored as someone who may be best described as “a “hopeless romantic on the inside and a realist on the outside.” This means that you value very highly both the safety, security and comfort of Companionate Love and the excitement and passion of Romantic Love. You desire someone who is on the same wavelength as you –sharing similar attitudes, moods and impulses. You are a clearly a hybrid, and someone who probably views love as a transcendent thing. That is, you regard true love as a precious and rare state that must be nurtured to grow and thrive. Most people in this scoring range believe that a passionate sex life is not the most important factor in a stable and satisfying relationship. Rather, a relationship must be nurtured with acceptance and compete connectedness with a partner – a couple building and possessively protecting their “own world.” Bottom line: You need someone whose highest priority is your relationship and is willing to do the hard work to keep a transcendent level of love alive in the relationship.

Issues you seem to Under-value

I find that my past partners and I usually shared the same mood. Possible reasons you responded this way include negative motivations and positive motivations. On the negative side, it could mean that you tend to choose incompatible partners, that you have poor emotional intelligence or that you are self absorbed. On the positive side, it could mean that you are an independent thinker, that you do not give in easily to social pressures or that you are able to remain consistently calm and collected during conflict.

Preferred Expressions of Affection
Preferred Expressions of Affection refers to your likes and dislikes for different ways a partner can express love and devotion. There are many ways in which people show affection to their loved ones: physical touch, doing favors, spending time together, giving gifts or communicating love through words. You scored as someone who responds best to Physical Touch. Bottom line: You need someone that prefers to express affection through simple or grand touch every day – a playful tickle, holding hands, hugs and kisses or a light touch as s/he passes by.

Out of the various modes of expressing affection, you scored as someone who responds least to Verbal Communication. Bottom line: You need someone that does not show affection through verbal expressions that you may consider somewhat superficial– such as spontaneous compliments, frequent “I love you’s,” occasional notes for you to find and recognition of your achievements.

I don't know what to do with myself, with my life. I'm wasting it. Everyone around me, the whole world, have these values. Money, career, family, usually in that order. I don't have the same values. I don't really care about money other than as a means to an end. I keep getting stupid crappy dead end jobs and quitting because I can't stand being that person. All my life I've felt like that song from sesame street. One of these things is not like the other...

I feel like a puzzle piece that doesn't fit anywhere, a missing piece. Where's the rest of me? Where's home?